Amazing, fantastic and lucky

“If you are hitting your head against the same brick wall over and over, walk in the opposite direction – then life’s gifts will flow again.”

Good advice. Thank you, Monique Hohnberg. Something about her words resonates with me. And I got to thinking… how in my own life am I hitting the same brick wall over and over?

  • worrying about money
  • trying to earn more
  • living with daily fear and anxiety
  • pushing my own physical limits

So, what would ‘going in the other direction’ mean exactly?

It’s simple, really. It’s free. All I have to do is to reverse the polarity of those thoughts, turning negative into positive. Because, as I have asserted before (and this is the joy of resilience) only I am in control of what I think about – and I can choose to think positively.

Here’s what I tell myself:

It’s amazing that you have held things together financially after what Sepsis did to you and your family.

It’s fantastic that you have preserved and strengthened your marriage to Nic, who remains and always will be your best friend and soul mate.

You’re so lucky to have two brilliant talented children, and to be their Dad. That’s the achievement of your lifetime, you must treasure it.

Every time my monkey brain (sorry, monkeys) falls into a negative way of thinking about my severe disability, I simply reverse the polarity – I flick a mental switch and encourage myself to think in these positive terms.

5 Ways You Can Stay Positive In Adversity

  1. Step away and get a reality check – ask someone you trust to give you their clear and unbiased perspective.
  2. See past the situation – imagine how things will look in one, five and ten years. This too will pass.
  3. Ask for and accept help – knowing when we need help and asking for it is a sign of strength.
  4. Look for a positive and focus on it – what doesn’t kill us, makes us stronger.
  5. Be grateful for what remains – write down the top 10 things you value in your life, refer to your list often. It’s a powerful tool.

The health benefits of positive thinking include: increased life span, lower rates of depression, lower levels of distress, greater resistance to illness, better well-being, better cardio health and better coping skills during hardship and stress.

Try it yourself. I wish you all the very best thoughts.

I feel like I have a great opportunity now to live quietly enjoying the good things and to avoid dwelling on my fears. I don’t find this easy, I have to make a daily effort to consciously do this – but I know it’s worth the effort. It’s my responsibility to create the best mindset that I possibly can.

3 Pieces Of Joy This Week

  1. A great trip to the limb centre in Leicester where the prosthetist fixed my right leg so it no longer hurts when I walk. Thank you.
  2. Listening to BBC Radio 4’s Saturday Live with coffee, in bed – bliss. Kindness for the mind.
  3. Speaking at a Health Education East Midlands training event at the Showcase Cinema in Nottingham, where they screened the brilliant Starfish the film. I feel proud to speak up for those who didn’t survive Sepsis, and to encourage people to feel purposeful. Courage.